How would you answer that? Does commuting affect your well-being? Would you say that you’re tired, you stand the whole way and it’s hot?

I wonder if you’ve ever paused to think of the effects of commuting on your mental well-being. There has always been plenty of videos online of something funny or entertaining happening on the tube, or perhaps the overground, and nine times out of ten it’s ignored. People glance up and quickly look away, they pretend it isn’t happening. One I saw recently was a dancing Spiderman, the whole carriage acted as if he wasn’t there. It was fun, entertaining moment, that went down like a lead balloon.

The comments underneath was unanimous in declaring that this was very much a ‘London’ response, that Londoners are miserable, that their daily life is joyless and soulless. Harsh? Perhaps!

If I saw that Spiderman on a train I know I would be entertained at this moment of silly fun, my son would absolutely love it, like most children. But children do have they wonderful innate sense of joy in everything they do, don’t they? When did we lose that ability to find joy?

This trail of thought continued, between adults losing their inner child and the adult responsibilities we face in a world that seems fractious. Ultimately though, despite those things being at play, I think it comes down to mindset.

If a dancing Spiderman on a tube carriage in the morning doesn’t make you smile or laugh, then I wonder when did we lose our sense of joy?

We know adults feel overworked, burnt out and stressed and we know those things can put a cloudier outlook on life. So how do we go about combatting this mindset to look for the joy, to notice the small moments and to actively welcome fun and joy back into our lives?

How do you find joy again?

It’s not that you must go searching for joy, it’s not that you have to manufacture it, although that does help (more on that later,) but it’s already there, you just have to notice it.

As you’re reading this, think of three things that brought you joy today? We hear it often; practise gratitude, but we hear it often because it’s an important piece of the mindset puzzle.
When you start actively being grateful you are choosing to be optimistic and focus on the positive, thus retraining the brain to feel joy more often and continue the cycle of positive reactions. How grateful are you for that cup of coffee in the morning perhaps made by a partner, or do you just take it for granted?

When you get in from work, arriving at your house and having dinner, how do you relax or switch off? Perhaps the doom and gloom of the news, or perhaps by scrolling the impossibly perfect life everybody portrays on social media? What you could be doing is to be fully present, enjoy your dinner, engage in conversation with loved ones or do something for yourself that helps you wind down. By being present you will notice and enjoy far more every single day instead of missing out.

I did mention that joy is already there, and you don’t need to manufacture it, but that doesn’t mean you can’t. In fact, if you feel you are particularly in a rut, over stressed or heading for burnout, making your own joy is a good place to start. By this, I mean you could create a joyful ritual, or schedule joyful time for yourself.

A morning ritual that brings you joy is the best way to start your day, so what does bring you joy in the mornings? I like to think about the things I do on holiday, so eating breakfast outside, listening to music while I’m getting ready, having my tea still hot and putting on clothes I love. These are minimal changes with maximum impact.

Give joy out, put more joy into the world. There are levels of giving back, we know philanthropy is growing and simple acts of paying it forward have gained popularity – caveat to not film them though. A simple way to bring joy may be to take some biscuits into the office, smile at people you pass, compliment a friend, let someone go in front of you at the shop or volunteer.
The list of small acts you can do that will give joy to both you and the recipient with leave you feeling fulfilled, it reminds you of the small stuff and the impact of human kindness, and that creates a positive brain reaction, fuelling a positive mindset.

So, is it Londoners that are ‘joyless’ or is it just adults that lost their way somewhere between building the career and a personal life they had hoped for, but now aren’t actively enjoying it?

Is the commute making them insular and stressed or perhaps it’s just one factor in the mental well-being of a working adult? For some, the commute is their moments of peace, it is when they switch off before or after work.

For others though, it’s functioning on autopilot and missing out life.

If this resonated with you, then it’s time to take back control and start putting joy back on your list of priorities and watch your life drastically improve.

And if you want to take it a step further then download your FREE self-care guide and be the first to know about my exclusive new launch coming soon!